There is no Way
We all want the way.
How do I get where you are?
How do I become like him?
How do people do that?
How long should it take?
What’s the best thing to do next?
Is this the right way?
There’s some good news, though most of us don’t see it like that.
There is no way.
There is no party line. There’s no group to report to, no manual that directs our thoughts or actions towards the “norms”.
Of course, Winston Churchill had it right, we must have some convictions of honor and good sense when it comes to our decision making.
Even still, we get to choose.
The problem, for some people, is this means we are on the hook.
As much as we might like to pretend that’s what we want, to choose, most of the time what we’d like is for someone else to choose for us. Because when we choose for ourselves we have to live with the consequences. We have to carry the burden of the results. We have to deal with whatever happens next. We have to accept that, “This might not work” and be okay with it. Sometimes it might work in our favor. Other times it might not.
We usually focus on the “it might not”, and we are not okay with it.
So what we like to do instead, is choose what’s easy, or most apparent, or what leans most closely into what “they” say. Which is not choosing at all. That way, we have someone to blame when it doesn’t work out. It’s easier that way.
It’s easier to sit around and try and figure out the “right” way, or the “best” way, or try and measure out all of the shoulds. But again, mostly, these things don’t exist.
It’s easier to choose not to choose, and then pretend to be upset about it. It’s also easier to stay frustrated, and upset, and lonely, and right where you are. It’s not easy, but it’s easier.
“Ahhh!! I just wish I knew what to do!”
You don’t. And you won’t. Two certain things:
1) Things are uncertain
2) What you should not do, is give up your opportunity to choose
There is no way.
We like to either hold on to our choices as if they were in short supply and we might run out if we make too many, or give them away to other people and let them use them for us instead.
Use some conviction and some good sense (which, sadly, are both in short supply), and make a choice.
See where it takes you. There is no way.
I’m pulling for you,
Bryan
